Whipping and Flogging

Please read  also Safety, and Safety: whips

With light or medium floggers, it is possible to deliver a sensual or sexual flogging.

The procedure is the same as for any sensual punishments and even if I will explain how I would do it, the exact details are not important. The general feeling of the scene is what matters.

For beginning of the session I would tie her spread eagled to a bed face down, not too tightly, letting her a little slack to move, in the most comfortable position possible, because the session should be fairly long. But she could also be left free if you both like it better that way. You could put a pillow under her head, it she prefers so. If you plan to hit mainly on the buttocks, the pillow should go under them.

Then, a calm and long warm up. Get the lightest flogger you have, and caress her by dragging the tails along her back, buttocks and legs, slowly, talking softly to her. You could use your free hand also for caressing. If the purpose is sexual, pass also the tails also over her genitals; touch them with your free hand.

Now begin hitting softly her all over the back of the body. As it should be a soft massage, there are not dangerous places. Hit everywhere, beginning at the calves, and going up methodically and rhythmically. Hit all over the legs, inside them, even the genitals when you reach there, if it arouses her. Then on the buttocks, covering all the area, and up the back.

When you reach the top of the back, go down hitting slightly harder, as in a hard massage. You should hit always predictably and rhythmically. On your way back, avoid the kidneys and the back of the knees. Depending on her preferences, you could massage the genitals, or avoid them.

Continue until reddening all the area, which should get slightly warmer.

And then, for the real thing. Now restrict your flogging to the safe areas agreed, the buttocks, the back, or both.

Begin flogging just a little harder than in the massage, and increase slowly the severity, always staying below your subs limit. When reaching the desired level, stop some time for caressing with your hands and with the whip, more intimately if it is a sexual session, and start again with a heavier flogging, again beginning soft and hitting increasingly harder. Do more turns, beginning each hitting softer than the end of the last turn and increasing the severity, and changing floggers to heavier ones, until you get to the agreed level.

Remember that the sub’s pain threshold will increase as her body fills with endorphins and adrenalin. The final level could be just a mild flogging, or reach a full whipping with a cat or whip, depending on the subs preferences.

If it was to be a sensual flogging, that can be it. Continue until she reaches the sub-space (that moment in which the sub reaches an endorphins high, that is compared by many with  a religious experience, where you float in space, without worries or cares), or reaches an orgasm, or at least just until you both a had enough. And then untie her, and go for the hugging and caressing for ending the session.

For a sexual flogging, (but it could also be done for a sensual one if you both like it) I will untie her, and turn her face up, tying her spread eagled but with the knees up, ankles tied to the sides of the bed, with with slack enough  for allowing for a lot of wriggling.

That position leaves unprotected the most sensitive parts of the body. You cannot flog hard anywhere on the front of a woman (but maybe for the top of the thighs). You can flog a little harder on a man’s chest.

But you can flog soft, with light instruments and just for the sting, on the breasts and the genitals (they are full of delicate structures, which are easily damaged). And this could be the moment for trying your horsehair flogger.

You can also hit that way on the lower part of the belly, not higher than the height of the hips. Alternate the flogging with caressing the breasts and the genitals, and you could also kiss her on her lips or lie over her and rub your body against hers. Do whatever you know that will arouse her.

For me as a sub, at least, it is very arousing to be tied face up, defenseless, being hit or caressed at her will. I like not being able to influence in the procedures. Maybe I would prefer that she would kiss me longer, maybe I would prefer not to be hit on the genitals again and maybe I would like finally having sex. But she is in control and manages the timing, and she decides what we will do and when.

She can excite me by caressing and kissing or she can turn me down with pain. In “normal” sex (yes, we, the BDSMers, also enjoy “normal sex”), I’m more of a dominant, and I like to have the command. Being forced to relinquish control is what I look for in BDSM. And if I try to get in control, even if tied, for instance trying to get my way when kissed, she could use some hard pain by flogging, slapping my face or pinching me for showing me who is in command.

And then for the final of the scene. When you both are aroused and can't stand it anymore, the reward. It could be vanilla sex, untying her, or it could be “rape”, if it is what was agreed, having her while still tied (that is what I enjoy more, being the top as much as being the bottom). The details of the final are better left to sex pages rather than to a spanking site like ours.

Published: 07/26/04